Guys, this is your ultimate guide for ideas for Valentines day and everything you need to know about Valentine’s day 2020! Read it, study it and do the work. I’m about to get you some points this Valentine’s day. Ladies if you are reading this, share this with him right now. Don’t wait! This is going to help you out this year.

Has your significant other ever said these words to you…

Everyday is Valentines day with you baby”

Every woman in the world

As much as she 100% means that statement, she is still probably looking for you to make this the most romantic Valentine’s day ever and you only have a few weeks to pull that off.

Guys, have you ever said this…

“Why do I need one day out of the year to show that I care about my significant other?”

Some men in the world

If this is something you have EVER said to her or in front of her, this article is definitely for you. The second you made that statement, you created a wall of protection that comes out a week before Valentine’s Day and she will downplay her expectations to avoid any chance of her being disappointed.

How do you know if this wall exists? If she says this to you or any of her friends…

“Valentine’s Day is not that big of a deal to me”…

Dissapointed women

Listen, I get it! Valentine’s Day has become so “phony” or it can be that way if you let it. I am one of those ladies who isn’t a huge fan of February 14th, mainly because my birthday is the day before so I am content with all the lovin’ I get leading up to that day. However, a romantic gesture is still welcome and accepted.

Or maybe your lady is a hopeless romantic and loves all things Valentines!

So, the question is…

How can I pull off a romantic Valentines day without all of the phony Halmark Holiday feels?

Every man in the world

The number one reason Valentine’s day has a bad reputation is Expectations.

FIRST AND FOREMOST… Find out what she is expecting. Trust me, this takes the pressure and stresses off. But you will want to do this because if she is expecting a beautiful piece of jewelry and you walk in with a box of heart-shaped chocolates, you should forget about the rest of the night because it probably will not happen.

Maybe you are planning a romantic dinner at the most expensive restaurant in town but all she wants to do is cuddle up on the couch and watch Friends. Do you realize how much money you would have saved if you would have taken the time to find out what the expectations for the evening were?!

It can be as simple or as extra as the expectations are.

Second, have fun! Don’t let expectations ruin the day. Take this time to focus on the relationship and not necessarily on the holiday.

Let it create a new spark in you that makes your alter ego want to come out! Be that romantic, sexy, confident man who sweeps in and woos your woman!

Think of it like you would your anniversary. Make it that big of a deal!

Men like a challenge right? So challenge yourself to make it the best VD yet!

Ladies, I am including you in this. All of the pressure isn’t just on him. If you want him to participate, you need to as well. Find ways for you to make it special and full of memories.

What NOT To Do:

Please do not get a stuffed animal and a box of chocolate from the nearest drug store because you waited until the last minute and now you are desperate. That is the kind of stuff that makes Valentine’s Day phony. Unless you are a teenager, then it’s super cute!

Don’t start a fight just so you don’t have to participate… (I don’t actually think this is you but I needed to say it just in case one person needs to hear this).

And please, please DONT FORGET!

What You Do!

Try! Just make an effort to make a special day. She/he will notice any efforts made and appreciate it.

Take advice from these experts! I asked people a bunch of people the following questions:

  • 1. Who enjoys Valentine’s day the most? You or your spouse?
  • 2. What is THE MOST romantic gesture you can receive on Valentine’s Day?
  • 3. Describe the ideal Valentine’s Day
  • 4. How long have you and your spouse been married?
  • 5. What is one thing you love the most about your spouse?
  • 6. Do you think it is the man’s job or the woman’s to make plans for VD?

Here are what they had to say!

Sheila & Jason

Happy Couple

1. Both of us

2.The time or creating a memory

3. At home grilling steaks and a nice bottle of wine. Candlelit conversation and an early bedtime

4. 32 years

5. How kind he is to other people. He feels Everyone deserves his attention and he makes people feel valued.

6. Both- we both have planned Valentine’s dates. It’s fun to mix it up and not have the same person to plan everything.

Jessica & Gary

Happy couple

1. I’d like to say we both do.

2. Time

3. Pizza/Wings and a movie on the couch

4. 18 years in March

5. His support

6. Equal

Michelle & Tommy

Happy couple

1. That’s a close one but I’d say Tommy because he puts in the most effort!

2. His cd’s and his gift of love to me in whatever form he chooses that year… it’s always unique and special.

3. Spent with my kids and hubs doing fun and silly things and making it an extraordinary day/night. I also love having my girlfriends over for a special breakfast or brunch because I love to shower them with silly, cheesy love too!

4. 16 yrs

5. His devotion to Jesus, me and our family. His gentle nature. He’s handsome as heck! He’s my biggest fan!

6. Both!!!!

Robert & Joanna

Happy couple

1. I think it’s enjoyed equally, but I’m also a big romantic so if I had to pick, it may be me just because I love doing those things for her that make her feel as special as she deserves. She puts up with me so she definitely deserves to feel special for that alone

2. Something old from our past that she may have kept that I’ve forgotten about ie, pictures, letters, memorabilia from an event that tells me she remembers how we fell in love (this questions hard btw)

3. Something simple and not overdone reminds us both of who we have and how special what we have still is. Maybe, cooking dinner together with wine NO KIDS LOL, watching a movie together from our early dating days. Not even romantic just one we loved watching together like SPACEBALLS  so we can laugh together … simplistic but so much quality 

4. 7 yrs on Aug 25th so 6.5?

5. What I love most is too easy: watching her blow my mind being the mother she is to my children. I genuinely fall in love watching it and how natural it is. It’s amazing. That and her butt (what do you want from me) 

6. I don’t think it’s either one “Job”. I think both having their own special gesture while trying to agree on what we want to do is show we’ve done it. 

Melissa & Tim

Happy couple

1. I think we both enjoy it equally. Tim loves to spoil me, and I love giving him sentimental gifts that he actually appreciates.

2. Last year for Valentine’s Day Tim got me the most romantic gift any busy mom would want. He booked a hotel room, filled it with chocolates and my favorite wine, out all of my favorite books and movies in there, ordered takeout. Then he told me to go spend the night by myself and enjoy the peace while he spent some quality time with the kids.

3. My ideal Valentine’s Day would be just spending time with Tim, focusing on nothing but each other and enjoying each other’s company.

4. We will be celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary this March.

5. I love that Tim is a big softy. He loves chick flicks sentimental gifts and all Disney movies. It’s adorable. 

6. I think we’re both equally responsible for making each other feel special on Valentine’s Day. Since he loves it so much, I let him take make the plans while I just focus on his gift.

Sandra & Ryan

Happy couple

1. ME! I’m sure he secretly loves it

2. A kiss

3. Warm weather, maybe dinner overlooking the beach somewhere with the breeze from the ocean all around. Drinking good Italian red wine with music playing in the background

4. 8 years!

5. I love how he supports me in everything I do. Noting is too crazy for him

6. Mainly the man’s job but a little surprise element added by the lady

Callie & Darryl

Happy Couple

1. Me.

2. Time and a thoughtful gift. ( out of the box)

3. A cabin in the mountains with snow all around. Just us two. No phones. No TV. No internet. Just the two of us and what God has made.

4. 7 1/2 years

5. His heart. He loves Jesus more than anything. He also has a servant’s heart.

6. Man’s

Notice how different they all are? Some are so simple, some are creative, and some are so very romantic.

I’m going to take this a step farther and give you a few gifts suggestions she/he will absolutely love!

For her

Blessings Bracelet

Blessings Bracelet


Coach Perfume

Coach Perfume


Genuine Leather Black Coach Bag

Black Coach Bag


Betsey Johnson Women’s Multi Lucite Heart Drop Earrings



For Him

Engraved Wallet Insert

Wallet insert


Funny Shirt

Funny shirt


Fossil Men’s Watch

Men’s Fossil Watch


You can’t go wrong if you communicate, buy a gift, make an effort and be intentional.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

I would love to hear from you! Answer the questions in the comment section below!

  • 1. Who enjoys Valentine’s day the most? You or your spouse?
  • 2. What is THE MOST romantic gesture you can receive on VD
  • 3. Describe the ideal Valentine’s Day
  • 4. How long have you and your spouse been married?
  • 5. What is one thing you love the most about your spouse?
  • 6. Do you think it is the man’s job or woman’s job to make plans for VD?


  1. Pingback: Valentine's Day Idea Roundup - Amy's Balancing Act

  2. This is a really sweet post! I love that Valentines Day is what you and your partner or spouse want it to be. The individual stories from the couples are really nice!

  3. You’re absolutely right. My husband doesn’t like Valentine’s Day and sees it as a commercialized day. However, he humors me by going along because he knows I enjoy celebrating it.

  4. I can’t remember the last time we celebrated Valentine’s Day. Maybe this year haha I’ll share this post with him as a hint.

  5. These are all lovely stories! It’s so important to celebrate love and keep the flame going 🙂 we find it a bit hard now that we have a baby and since we are expats in Switzerland, we don’t have families around to help out. This year we’ll try to make the most out of it with the three of us 🙂

  6. The title of this post says it all really. Made me Lol! Totally we are into v day but we do make sure that we have days dedicated to each other. Although I don’t want to get into the commercials of v day, I still want a v day 😂🤣

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